Sunday, April 25, 2010

2nd ComMANdment: Thou shalt only wear pants (and shorts)

Over in the Hague, they've just put away a couple of Serbian war criminals, and now they're putting the man-skirt on trial for crimes against humanity.

I really didn't want to have to make this a comMANdment.  I thought it was obvious.  But APPARENTLY it is not obvious enough to some people.

Warning: the following contains graphic ugliness and may not be appropriate for all viewers.

Marc Jacobs, have you taken leave of your senses? How can someone who creates such lovely clothes choose such bad clothes for himself? Really Marco, it's time to stop hitting the crack pipe, or whatever it is that made you think that this was in any way an acceptable thing to wear out in public. You look like a schizophrenic cross-dressing construction worker.

It's not just you, dear. Even models can't pull this off:

Seriously, the man-skirt is possibly more eye-scalding than the locker-rooms at the JCC (sidenote: no one should be walking around naked. But if you're old, you should DEFINITELY not be walking around naked, okay?).

Another thing that's neither pants nor shorts, and thus should never be worn, are meggings:

                          
I like how they're trying to make it seem like normal, professional work-wear.  Like "Ready to go! I've got my briefcase, my oxfords...and my meggings! Gonna impress the boss with how sharp I am."

Meggings are preferable to the man-skirt, but only in the way that being shot is preferable to being torn apart by wild dogs.

This is one commandment you really shouldn't break.

2 comments:

  1. This is hilarious!
    You are so right about this. Spot on in your details and commentary.

    ReplyDelete
  2. hahahaha wild dogs

    ReplyDelete